The Forever Bible: A Bible that Literally Walks on Water

Not to get all grammar Nazi on them but a bible can't "literally" walk on water because it "literally" lacks the legs to do so. Anyway… dontcha just hate that your bible is constantly getting run over by cars, or dropped on a land mine or something? No? Me either, but if you are one of those people have I got a kickstarter for you. 

"Waterproof. Dirt-proof. Tear-proof. Virtually indestructible. It’s the first Bible in history built (and guaranteed) to last FOREVER.

For centuries, publishers have printed the Bible with impeccable detail, using the highest quality papers and leather. We are continuing that tradition by printing the Bible with the very best materials that exist today. Using Space Age nanotechnology, we are able to print the Bible on an advanced paper that doesn’t use any trees, is 24X stronger than regular paper, and is completely waterproof, dirt-proof, tear-proof, and otherwise life-proof. The Forever Bible even floats in water, while keeping your notes and highlighted passages pristine."

Also, in a twist that could have only happened with the help of Jesus, they’re already selling the Bibles at a separate site before reaching their Kickstarter goal! It’s a miracle! 

Let’s hope someone doesn't make a indestructible Koran. Next thing you know, people will put it to the test to find out whether you can rip its pages or set it on fire and then all hell will break loose…. literally.


The Forever Bible: A Bible that Literally Walks on Water.
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